Perfect
by Galaxystar
Summary: NEW!Perfection can torment a soul, make it bleed, become a slow,silent killer.That's the side of perfection that we seldom see, but it's there. Everyday someone will take their life, all for the sake of perfection.Involves cutting&Simple Plan Song
1. Default Chapter

** Hi, this is Galaxystar once again, Happy Memorial Day to EVERYONE!!!!! I hope that you enjoy my new story, and please, please REVIEW. (This is mildly depressing...)**

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**Disclaimer: C'mon guys, I thought everyone knew that I owned Sailor Moon? (Dodges flying rotten tomatoes and veggies!) Okay, um April fools anyone? Please don't sue!**

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**(Please Read this before you read my story!)**

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**Serious Author's Note: (Cutting is a serious matter, and I am not making light of this situation. This is simply a story that I wrote, and that came from my own imagination during a rather depressing episode in my life. Cutting is a very detrimental and destructive act. An act that not only harms the cutter, but the family and friends as well, as will b explained later in this story. I admit that this is a rather depressing story, and if you aren't in to this type of subject, then turn back now, but if you want to give me and my story a chance then gladly read on and enjoy yourself. No flames please, you have been warned.)**

**:) Whether or not Part 2 will be posted is up to you guys! :)**

**Now, on with the show! "Give Me A Beat Shaka!" **

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**Perfect (Part 1)**

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_**Hey dad look at me   
Think back and talk to me   
Did I grow up according to plan?   
Do you think I'm wasting my time doing things I wanna do?   
'Cuz it hurts when you disapprove all doing   
  
**_

_****_

> "Usagi! Get down here now!" A tall, lean, middle-aged man roared from the bottom of the

stairs. Usagi scampered out of her room and down the steps as fast as she could, taking them

two at a time.

> "Usagi, came the very same roar, don't make have to call you again!" "I'm coming Daddy,"

screeched the voice of an obviously shaken blonde.

> She hopped down the last three steps, and barely missed diving head first into the

Tuskino family coat rack. "See daddy, she puffed, I'm here!" "Sit!" He bellowed sharply just as

Usagi's mother stepped out of the kitchen door and into the living room. Neither one of them

looked happy Usagi noticed, immediately on her guard.

> Irene seated herself comfortably in a chair before motioning for her husband Ken to

proceed. Well Usagi, he began, do you have any idea as to why you are down here?" "N-no,"

Usagi mumbled while staring down at her hands, carefully folded in her lap.

> "In fact weren't you seated in this very spot nearly two months ago?" Usagi continued to

stare blankly at her hands. "I asked you a question, Ken bellowed again, did you hear me young

lady?"

> Serena nodded her head slowly, "Yes sir, I remember." "Oh really, quipped Irene, well, if

you remember so much then why are we having this conversation?" "What conversation---?"

> "Quiet Usagi! Do you know what this is? Her father raged, while holding up a yellow sheet

of paper. This, he said waving it around, this is that little Geometry exam that you supposedly

spent two weeks studying for, this is your grade Usagi. Would you like to see where all of that

"hard" work got you!?" Her father's voice dropped to a low, furious tone.

> Not waiting for an answer the results paper was shoved unceremoniously into her face,

and suddenly she and a big red 57% were having a staring match. Care to explain? Irene asked,

her face showing signs of both fury and exhaustion, making her look much older than she really

was.

> Her daughter's bright baby eyes began to water and her lower lip began to tremble.

"Nothing to say Usagi? Well that's a first, where are your excuses? You had better have a damn

good one for this, he said pointedly as he gestured to her test."

"Dad…Mom…I…I can't say anything, I-I have no excuse. But I really did try and---"

> But Usagi was unable to finish because Irene cut her off. "That's right Usagi, you have

nothing to say because there is nothing to be said!"

> "Your father and I work so damn hard so that we can send you to Juuban High, and all

you do is waste our money! Usagi opened her mouth to speak…Shut up Usagi Tuskino, I don't

want to hear it! We thought you had changed, you were improving so much that…we…I…Oh I

don't know." Her voice began to quiver as she buried her face in her hands.

> Ken, her husband, rubbed her upper back soothingly. "Oh, Ken, she sobbed slightly as

she lifted her face from her hands, where did we go wrong?"

"Ask Usagi that question, he replied grimly, she should know."

> Two silent tears caressed Usagi's flushed cheeks as she continued to stare quietly at

the paper in her hands. She couldn't understand it; she really had been improving, why all of her

C's and D's were now B's and the occasional B. She really had spent two weeks preparing for

her Geometry Exam, there had to be some logical explanation for this! It wasn't fair, someone

had to have made a mistake, they simply must have! Usagi started to say this to her parents, but

one look from her father had her shutting her mouth again. Usagi, really had begun taking on her

responsibilities.

> She was now on time to all Senshi meetings, with the exception or one or two. Usagi

also took charge during those meetings, recognizing her position as leader. Her daily squabbles

with Rei still existed, but occurred less frequently. There were still times when she tripped or fell

down, but those times were also decreasing in number, and she didn't cry as much either. Even

her Mamo-chan had begun looking at her differently, he was beginning to see her as a woman,

may be even as her future self! They could now hold a mature conversation over an extended

period of time without Usagi getting bored, and it had begun changing his perception about her

completely! She was growing up right in front of her best friend's and boyfriend's eyes!

> "Usagi...(deep breath)…Usagi…for once in my life I honestly don't know what to do with

you. We have never had this problem out of your brother Shingo, never. Do you honestly like

disappointing us, making us feel as though we have failed you as parents?"

> "But Daddy, If you would just listen I could—" "Not another word out of that loud little

mouth of yours if you want to keep it! It's starting to piss me Miss Smartie Pants!"

> "We've tried to help you out Usagi, offered to get you a tutor but… But Ami-chan tutors me!

She—she---" "That's enough! Yelled Ken. I think you really do enjoy letting us down...you do it

often enough Usagi."

> The elder Tuskinos were both too angry to even attempt to keep themselves in check.

Too angry to care about whether or not they were slowly crushing Usagi who was struggling to

breathe. Killing their Usagi, who, gasping for air, was continually being pulled under by wave after

wave of self-resentment, shame, and sadness, their Usagi who suffered silently in the deepest,

darkest depths of her soul.

> "No friends, no arcade, no phone...no nothing! I will call Andrew tomorrow so that he

knows to call us if he catches even so much as looking at a video game through a window! Your

teachers will be notified as well Usagi, and they will call us if you forget your Homework, goof-off,

sleep, or whatever it is you use your class periods for."

> And on and on they went, neither of the two noticing a broken Usagi steadily sinking lower

into the couch in a futile attempt to shield her mind from their harsh words.

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_**And now I try hard to make it   
I just want to make you proud   
I'm never gonna be good enough for you   
I can't pretend that   
I'm alright   
And you can't change me **_

_****_

> By the time Usagi was allowed to go upstairs she was shaking, her body racked with

silent sobs. A silent pain that was slowly eating her from the inside out, a pain so unfamiliar to

Usagi that it scared her, but she could tell no one else.

> Fumbling for the door knob and wiping her eyes she stumbled into her room. It was

then she heard the loud beeping of her communicator, which was lying somewhere in the

darkness. Usagi groped hurriedly for her light switch.

> She had to find her communicator, her parents had kept her downstairs so long that it was

impossible to know how long it had been beeping! As the light engulfed her room she dove for

her desk and frantically began knocking books and papers on the floor, she would have to clean

it up later.

> Finally she found it under a shirt she had carelessly thrown on her bed; thank God it was

still beeping. Flipping the top Usagi answered: "Moon here, what's the problem?"

> "Sailor moon, came the voice of the Senshi of Venus, took you long enough, where are

you? What's the hold up!?" Usagi noticed that Venus was breathing hard, and that there was a

small cut over her eye that was bleeding profusely.

> "Oh, God Venus, I'm in my room...shit...where are you guys?" Suddenly Venus was

knocked out of the way, and in her place was the furious Senshi of Mars. "What do you mean

you're still in your room, we figured that you were on your way!"

> "I didn't know Mars, I swear I---" "I don't want to hear it Usagi, just get your but down here;

we're in the park, by the rose bushes." With that and a final click she was gone.

> Peeking outside her door she was pleased to find that her parents were now in their

bedroom. She whispered her transformation mantra and leapt out the window, taking off full

speed down the street and into the moonlight.

_**  
'Cuz we lost it all   
Nothing lasts forever   
I'm sorry   
I can't be perfect   
Now it's just too late and   
We can't go back   
I'm sorry   
I can't be perfect **_

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> Her lungs felt as though they were going to burst. It felt like she had been running for

hours when she finally reached her destination, the park.

> Usagi was running as though the devil himself was nipping at her heels, but she made it

there in a matter of seconds. What she saw before made stop cold, made her blood ring in her

ears. It seemed as though she was watching everything in slow motion as she watched Makoto

take a blast to her stomach and flew head first into a tree.

Once again she felt the urge to cry, this was her fault, all her fault, and she was going to fix it!

> "All right, hold it right there Mister. Usagi was literally seething inside. How dare you

attack my friend? How dare you disturb our sleep? And how dare you disturb the worst day of my

life? I'm sick and tired of watching you drain your innocent victims day after day, it stops here! I

am Sailor Moon, the Champion of Justice! I right wrongs and triumph over evil, and in the name of

the Moon, I will punish you nega-sleeze!"

> Not even waiting a second for the youma to close its hanging jaw Usagi took out her

scepter and let him have it. The thing was dusted in ten seconds flat.

> Satisfied when the-would-be youma was now nothing more than a puddle of moon dust

she turned to her friends. Ami had managed to prop Makoto up against the tree and was

assessing her wounds, a large bruise was forming on her left arm. Minako was leaning against

Mamoru's shoulder taking deep breaths and looking deathly pale, while Rei continued to stare

directly through her, almost like she was trying to burn through her soul and completely ignoring

the jagged gash across her right thigh.

> For the second time that evening Usagi was at a loss for words, after all, they

wouldn't believe her explanation anyway. She could feel Mamoru's eyes on her, but could not

bear to see what lay in those deep stormy blue eyes, she knew that obvious disappointment

would lay in those depths. Anger, it was radiating from everyone, filling the park, and choking

Usagi.

> All eyes were on Usagi as she took center stage, prepared to dazzle them with one

of her famous excuses, but for once it wasn't an excuse, it was the truth. A pair of red heels came

into view and Usagi immediately focused on Rei instead of the tiny firefly below.

> The look of fury and anger, and even hurt caused her stomach to clench painfully, but

instead of lighting into her as Usagi had expected her to do, she simply stared, and Usagi did

the same.

> "You just don't get it Usagi, she bit, her voice laced with venom, you really don't get it.

She grabbed a hold of Usagi's arm and squeezed painfully, that was going to leave one hell of a

mark. My God are you really that stupid? I thought it was all an act, a strange one, but an act just

the same. I thought you had some brains up there, instead of just plain, dumb odangos! I can't

even begin to fathom the reason for Luna's keeping you as leader. You are just a disaster waiting

to happen; you do more damage than most of The Death Buster's youmas! One day, you're

going to get one of us killed, provided you don't get yourself killed first! Princess or no Princess,

I am sick of you always taking your sweet time getting to these fights. Yeah, we know you have a

life Usagi, but sometimes you have to let it rest on the back burner, your responsability for this

planet is more important, or at least it should. If we have to sacrifice, so should you dammit!"

> "Now Rei, interjected Minako, you're not being very fair to Usagi. 'Ah, Usagi thought,

good old Minako, she would never abandon her in her time of need.' You didn't let her give us

her pathetic excuse explaining her tardiness. I think that the sun would cease shinning if Usagi

didn't give us at least a hand full of them everyday, so what's just ONE more? C'mon Usagi, let's

hear it! Did ya trip on your way down hear? See the new Sailor V video game poster and just had

to stop and take a look? Talk Usagi, and try to make funny." Each of Minako's words seemed to

be drenched in sarcasm.

> "I...Minako...I thought you of all people would understand me..."Usagi sputtered tearfully.

"I do, Minako replied, in fact we all understand you better than you think Usagi. If anything Luna

should have made me leader the second I set foot in Tokyo. You are way too much of a

distraction; how are we supposed to save and protect the world when we have to constantly

protect you? I'm sorry, but I can't just sit by and watch our team literally deteriorate due to lack of

leadership. Usagi, you are either gonna have to shape up or ship out. Those are your two

choices."

> "Usagi I have to say that agree wholeheartedly with Minako and Rei. Ami's quite yet

stern voice broke in. None of us can go on like this, because of you Jupiter was hurt tonight

trying to attack the monster on her own so that we could recoup. I know that I can speak for

everyone when I say that we thought you had changed your old, irresponsible ways. Guess we

spoke too soon huh? I have to say that I am disappointed, not only in you, but also in your lack

of competence when it comes to leading the Sailor Senshi. For now, we'll leave it at that

because I think that the majority of us have had a rough night, and I am prescribing bed rest for

us all. As for you, Ami added thoughtfully, I think that you need to do a little soul searching. You

need to see whether or not you really want to continue leading this team."

> Rei, who was already on her way home stopped only second to turn her head and

whisper, "We'll need an answer by tomorrow Usagi", then she turned and continued on her way

back to the Shrine."

> Lita hooked her long, slightly bruised arm around Mamoru's shoulders before allowing

him to half-drag, half-walk her out of the park. Lita gave her a feeble smile before mouthing that

she was alright and to call her tomorrow. Mamoru stopped and turned to face Usagi, he sighed

and shook his head before muttering something about him calling her tomorrow. Apparently he

wanted a piece of her as well.

> It was too late now to do anything except go home and attempt to use what few hours she

had left to sleep. She would need it for the Senshi Meeting tomorrow. Usagi still moved quickly,

but her pace had slowed considerably since there was no longer any immediate danger.

Leaping from rooftop to rooftop so that she wouldn't be seen, Usagi made it home in a little less

than a half hour.

> She opened her window and crept inside her room, stumbling and tripping over various

objects blocking her path. It was dark, being that the only visible light was coming from the

moon, because Usagi hadn't wanted to risk turning on the lights, hadn't wanted to have to look at

the pathetic weakling that she would see in the mirror.

> There had been no mistake in her grades, she had been the mistake. Everything that

they had said had made perfect sense, she should never have been made leader. Come to

think of it, she ought to give it to Minako or Rei, let one of them take over and see how hard

being in charge could be.

> Usagi sat, having long since detransformed back into her civilian attire, and proceeded

to bang her head into what she assumed to be a wall. "Shimatta!" She cursed quietly, that hadn't

been a wall, that had been the leg her chair, a rather solid, metal chair. She cursed her self again

as she felt the new tears form in her eyes and slowly cascaded down her cheeks.

> The tears weren't so much from physical pain, but from emotional overload and the dull

pain that resided in her heart. In other words everything was piling up and spinning out of control.

She knew her destiny was to eventually become the ruler of the Future Crystal Tokyo, but how

was she supposed to get there?

> There were no guidelines, no books or pamphlets on how to rule a country. This

wasn't something that her precious Mamo-chan could explain to her, this was something that

neither he nor Ami would understand, even if they were still speaking to her.

> Sailor Moon was a let down, a joke, a disgrace to the Sailor Scouts and to her kingdom

as well, hell, even the funniest looking youmas seemed more threatening than she did, and all

they usually did was cause their victims to laugh hysterically before they had their energy

zapped.

> That said a lot about her didn't it? She didn't have Jupiter's strength, Venus' charisma

on the battle field, or Mars's military discipline, she didn't have Mercury's intelligence or quick

mind when it came to making a split second decision. In short, Usagi was just plain old Usagi,

just a big useless lump of nothing.

> Either she ate too much too fast, or she wailed too loudly, or she was too clumsy

and never seemed to be anywhere on time. Those qualities described a child, not a leader.

> Usagi stood, the effort seemingly draining her of what little energy she had left. Stripping

as fast as she could, she tossed her shirt over her shoulder, not caring where it landed. She

repeated the same action with her tan shorts

> Throwing on an overly large tee-shirt, Usagi climbed drowsily into bed, all the while

wishing away the dawn that she knew would be arriving within a matter of hours. She wanted to fall

asleep, and never wake up.

> Usagi reached over and after a minute or two of fumbling she located her jewelry box.

Even in the dark she had no trouble finding what she was looking for. She smiled grimly while

examining the little rectangular object that lay in the palm of her hand.

> It was a razor blade, nothing more, nothing less. A girl from school had given it too

her some time ago when she noticed Usagi balling her eyes out in the bathroom. The girl had

hugged Usagi, comforted her, and told her that she understood her pain. They sat there just like

that for the remainder of their lunch period, huddled together as Usagi rambled and sobbed like

a small child. Hot tears had coursed down her two, soft cheeks as the strange girl had continued

to hold her.

> Neither one of them had been worried about someone intruding in their private moment,

after all this was practically a girl's social hour. When Usagi had gotten what she'd wanted to off

her chest, the girl had given her name to Usagi, as well as her phone number and this little

present. She told Usagi that her gift would ease her pain every time she felt like she was being

pushed over the edge. The feelings it produced, the girl had said, were indescribable, so much

in fact that they often made her forget what she had been so upset about in the first place. The

bell ended soon after that, and they left the confines of the bathroom together, they parted ways

and Usagi promised to call her if she ever needed to talk.

> Now Usagi needed someone to talk to more than ever, but she couldn't call her new

found friend, this was Senshi business. She would have to take matters into her own hands since

she had no one else to confide in.

> Usagi flipped the on-switch for her radio and turned down the volume. As it happened,

Usagi had switched on in the middle of a song. One that eerily suited and described her mood,

she had heard it somewhere before, during some other time and had found mildly depressing

just by listening to the slow, sad beat. The song was titled something like "Perfect", and made by

some punk rock band.

> The words seemed to float out across the air and envelope her, washing over her. The

sweet yet depressing beat mellowed her tortured soul, filling her with a strange sense of peace

and calm. She shut her eyes and closed her soft palm over the blade, blinking back tears as she

felt the sharp blade cut into her skin, drawing blood.

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_**I try not to think   
About the pain I feel inside   
Did you know you used to be my hero?   
All the days you spent with me   
Now seem so far away   
And it feels like you don't care anymore **_

_****_

> Dropping the crimson covered blade into her opposite hand, she closed her eyes and

let the melody take over her body.

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_**  
And now I try hard to make it   
I just want to make you proud   
I'm never gonna be good enough for you   
I can't stand another fight   
And nothing's alright   
**_

> She slid the razor over her arm, the cool metal blade sent waves of both pain and

surprisingly enough, pleasure through her. She reveled in the pain that the slicing of her flesh

was giving her. Her body felt numb with adrenaline, and she forgot all of her troubles as she

sliced bloody lines across her pale flesh again and again.

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Nothing's gonna change the things that you said   
Nothing's gonna make this right again   
Please don't turn your back   
I can't believe it's hard   
Just to talk to you   
'Cuz you don't understand   
  
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> _Usagi dragged the razor across her skin repeatedly, not stopping until the flesh on her

arm was raw and red, and the blood was oozing freely from her various wounds. She had

brought this on herself, and it put Usagi's troubled mind at ease knowing that she was punishing

herself for her own misdeeds.

> As the song ended, Usagi realized that she was crying, her tears mixing with her newly

spilt, sticky blood. She felt...oh she couldn't explain the feeling...she just felt...cleansed in a

sense, renewed if you will. Almost like her spirit had been purified.

> Usagi wrapped a shirt around her arm so that she wouldn't ruin her bed sheets anymore

than she already had and sat staring aimlessly out her window for the remainder of the night. She

would have to hide the shirt from her mother in the morning, and find some place safe to get rid

of it later.__

**Somewhere Far Far Away**

An angel rested uneasily in her deeply troubled sleep. Her body was drenched in sweat,

and tears coursed lightly down her cheeks, but never once did she make a sound. The angel's

face took on a tortured look of pain as she began to twist and turn violently. She began clawing at

herself with her nails, causing more scratches and welts to mar her milky white arms and face.

She was fighting someone or something, and it was killing her, starting slow, working its way from

the inside out, tearing her apart. Even whilst she slept, the dreams and nightmares continued to

plague her. Just as quickly as her convulsions began they slowed and then came to a stop,

leaving her simple gown in tattered shreds. The moonlight rested on the angel's face, offering

her what little comfort it could provide the mysterious and beautiful angel by bathing her in it's

eerie glow, protecting her from the overwhelming darkness that surrounded her...and on she

slept...

END PART 1

**Thanx for reading! Like it? Hate it? Are you guys interested in what's going on here? I hope that the last part wasn't too confusing, but if it was review or e-mail me for an explanation, and I'll be happy to give you one! Whether or not I WILL POST PART 2 is UP to YOU guys! Depending on HOW MANY PEOPLE take the time to REVIEW will let ME KNOW WHETHER OR NOT I should CONTINUE. SO DROP ME A LINE SOMETIME SOON!!!!!**

**Galaxystar**


	2. Perfect Part 2

**_AUTHOR'S NOTES: Hi everybody! Sorry that this has taken so long for me to post, but I wanted to make it good! I won't bore you with the details, but please make sure to read my closing notes and review! If enough people want me to continue I will, but if I don't get any responses then... I'm sure you guys understand! Please READ AND REVIEW!!!!!!!!!_**

_**P.S. **_

_**Please excuse any grammar mistakes, I checked it over, but I always miss things and it's been like forever since I've updated... Long story short, I just wanted to post it!**_

**PERFECT: PART 2**

It was cold, in fact it was freezing, but for once Usagi was thankful that she had

an excuse to wear a long-sleeved shirt. Since she was a Sailor Scout, Usagi healed faster

than most normal people, so the scratches on her arm were now nothing but thin pale

scars, though they were still very noticeable. With any luck they would be gone within a

few days.

Today, unfortunately, was Saturday, and the day of the dreaded Senshi meeting.

Today she would have to make her decision. Should she stay as the leader, or should she

give up and resign? Usagi pondered this question as she trudged to the Arcade. It was

only around ten or so, so none of the scouts would be there, ready to make her feel worse

than she already did.

The twinkle of bells that signaled a new arrival usually, for some odd reason,

brightened Usagi's mood, but not today. She ignored her friend, Motoki, and his worried

glances in her direction and proceeded to seat herself in the farthest booth from the door.

For it to be so early in the morning the place was swamped with people and it

looked like the arcade was short a couple waitresses, so Motoki wouldn't have any time

to take a break and come bother her. After fifteen minutes an exhausted waitress who

looked like she missed her morning coffee came to take her order, and by now Usagi was

starving. She ordered two hot sticky buns and lemon tea...she'd need her strength for

today.

Ten minutes later two gooey, piping hot sticky buns and a mug of hot tea were

brought to her by another frazzled looking waitress. Usagi immediately began to slather

on the extra warm, sweet butter cream icing from the container resting on her plate, she

hadn't asked for extra icing...but she wasn't complaining.

It only took Usagi ten minutes to polish off the sticky buns before she moved on

to the tea, which was still rather warm. She heard the bells chime once more, signaling

another new customer, but she didn't bother looking up, that is, until she heard the

approach of footsteps. The owner of the footsteps turned out to be a girl, a very special

girl, and her name was Connie Ikiyama.

"Got room for one more?" Connie asked while gesturing towards the nearly empty booth.

"Of course...I could use a friend right now...please sit down." Usagi smiled, Connie noticed, but when she did it seemed like the light had gone out in her eyes, a light that Connie had grown accustomed to seeing.

"You don't have to tell me twice! Jeeze dude, it's freezing out there...today has got to be

a record! She said while blowing on her red hands, trying to warm them up. But it's an

excuse to wear long sleeves right?

Usagi blushed and shyly nodded her head in agreement. "How've you been Connie? I haven't seen you in a while."

"Well I was waiting for a certain someone to call me, but they never did. I wonder why?"

"I know that I said I'd call you Connie, in fact I promised, but so much has happened recently and---"

"I understand Tuskino, life got in the way. It happens to all of us, believe me. Please excuse my bluntness, but have you done it yet? At Usagi's blank look she tried again. What I mean is have you used the you-know-what yet?"

Taking a quick look around to make sure she wasn't being watched, Usagi rolled up her sleeve for Connie to see.

Connie's eyes widened at the long, jagged scars that covered the tan skin. "Wow...those are some pretty vicious looking scars Usagi. What happened?"

Usagi shook her head as her hands clenched the fabric of her skirt in her lap. "I got into a fight...with my group. And now they wanna kick me out, and my boyfriend is mad at me, and so are my parents. Everything is just becoming so bad Connie...I don't know what to do anymore!" Usagi sniffled quietly before burying her face in her small hands.

The brunette reached over the table to Usagi's trembling hand in her own. A girl like

Usagi never deserved to be so depressed, it just wasn't right. Nobody was ever going to

hurt her again, not under her watch, this girl would never cry again.

"It's alright sweetie, Connie soothed, they can't hurt you anymore. Not with me around, and don't worry because I'll be your friend. You can call me, visit me, e-mail me, I don't care what you do, but I want you to talk to me Usa. Don't you ever feel like you have no one who'll listen to you, got that?"

Usagi nodded tearfully as her new friend gently wiped her tears away.

"Good."

"Look, I think that we both could do with a little...excitement in our lives, especially you babe. What do ya say we go to a party or somethin'?"

The blonde sniffed lightly, before replying. "Where is it?"

Connie blushed slightly, "It's just a little thing at my boyfriend's house tonight. He's cool...and he knows about...well the stuff I do. Besides, his friends, at least some of them anyway, are into...are you okay Usagi?

Usagi was just sitting there, staring detachedly out the window. When she turned around her eyes were filled with new tears. "This thing...is what I did...what we're doing bad Connie? Does it mean something is wrong with us? Is this normal?"

"We are perfectly normal babe, and so is what we do. Nobody knows you Usagi, and no one understands you except me. There are others like us, other people that feel the same way that we do. We're a special breed Usagi, because we know how to deal with pain. We can live with heartbreak without breaking ourselves. Don't you see? We're better than our "so-called" friends...we know that life isn't just a---ah..." Connie stopped talking for a moment as she lost her train of thought and her eyes glazed over.

"We know that life isn't what Connie?"

"Huh? I dunno what happened..." She blinked and then shrugged off her sudden lapse of thought. "That happens to me a lot nowadays...go figure!"

Connie reached across the table to wrap her arms around the blonde's shoulders, giving her a squeeze. "I'll always be here for you babe, no matter what, you got that?"

Usagi smiled and nodded her head, before wiping her eyes as they began to water again.

**::AHEM::**

Came a voice from behind them, causing Connie to pull away from Usagi almost

instantly. Connie's eyes narrowed suspiciously at the newcomer, it was one of Usagi's

friends, she had seen her around a few times before.

Both Connie and Makoto looked each other over, a silent challenge resided in their eyes.

Connie was the first to remove her gaze, she turned back to Usagi and with a wink began

collecting her things. She stood and brushed passed the tall brunette, smirking as their

shoulders purposely bumped. Turning one last time she caught Usagi's eye and put her

hand to her ear as though she was speaking into a phone, the blonde bunny nodded in

response, mentally making a note to do just that.

"Focusing her attentions on Mako-chan, Usagi attempted crack a feeble smile. Uh, how--how are you, uh, holding up?"

"I'm actually just fine, to be perfectly honest with you girl, Merc---I mean Ami's got me so drugged up that I can't even feel my toes. How about you?"

"F-fine, thanks for asking." The blonde mumbled, eyes downcast. "I'm sorry Mako, it's my fault that you were hurt last night. I should have known that there was no possible way that we could ever go a night without being ambushed by youmas."

"Stop that." Came Mako's gruff reply.

"Stop what?"

"Stop fucking apologizing Usagi! Things happen, and I knew that when I took this job years ago. It says so in the Sailor Senshi handbook, you mean you don't own a copy?"

Makoto frowned when Usagi didn't respond to her lame joke; this was definitely not like her Bunny.

The two girls sat in silence for what seemed like hours, neither sure of what to say.

"Look Makoto, Usagi spoke up finally averting her eyes from her friend's expectant gaze, I appreciate you sitting here with me, but I'm sure you have other, more important things to do, because I do. There's no need for you to pretend like you're not angry with me, the entire team is mad at me for heaven's sake and they aren't afraid to show it, so why are you trying to spare my feelings?"

Makoto chewed her lip nervously for a second, unsure of how to respond. She sighed

deeply before she began, and prayed to the gods above that she was saying the right

thing.

"I'm not angry with you Usa-chan, I just want to know why you weren't there. Minako and Rei didn't mean what they said the other night, and you know Ami didn't mean it. They were tired, we all were, and...well...you were the most available target. I know that doesn't make it right but---"

"Yeah, you're right. It doesn't but that's never stopped any one of you guys before."

"Just let me finish Usagi! I know that reason doesn't make it right but you've never let it bother you like this before! So why now?"

"Why now? I'm surprised that Rei didn't just all out hit me last night, sweet lord I know she wanted to... It's my fault Mako, I caused this problem and now I have to fix it. Can't you understand that?"

Makoto struggled to keep her voice low and even as she spoke. "But that doesn't mean that you have to let them walk all over you to make a point Usagi! I love you, they love you, and even Mamoru loves you! I just---" Usagi winced when Makoto's fist pounded loudly on the table, but when Usagi looked around she was relieved to find that the other customers were still ignoring them. "Stand up for yourself Usagi, don't be afraid of Rei, because if you can handle fire breathing youmas, then you can handle a fire breathing Senshi."

"Thanks Mako, it's just that I don't want to hurt anybody, even Rei."

Makoto smiled slightly before gesturing to her blonde friend's empty plate and drained cup. "Are you, uh, done yet Usa-chan?"

"Yeah, I guess..." She trailed off as she took a glance towards the Arcade clock; it was nearly time for the Senshi meeting.

"Then how about we get an early start on our trek to the temple?"

"Alright Mako...if you want." Usagi flipped her loose strands of honey blonde hair behind her as she prepared to stand up, causing the sleeve covering her slashed wrist to rise up slightly. As soon as she felt her warm skin become exposed to the cool air she blushed and quickly pulled it down, but she wasn't fast enough for the Senshi of Thunder.

Mako eyed the girl before her suspiciously, even though she'd only seen it for a fraction of a second, she was sure something was there. "Usagi, what was that thing on your arm? Did you hurt yourself last night?"

Usagi could feel herself begin to panic suddenly under her friend's penetrating gaze. "Um... I---"

"Excuse me, interrupted the same waitress that had served Usagi earlier that morning, I'm really sorry, but if you're finished could you please leave your booth? We normally wouldn't do this, but since we have to accommodate so many people today we are trying to get customers in and out quickly." She took a breath and patted down her frizzy red hair before she set to clearing the table.

"Thank the Gods!" Usagi whispered under her breath, thankful that she had been spared from having to lie to her friend.

"What was that?" Makoto wondered, still eying Usagi's arm.

Usagi simply shook her head before grabbing her things and exiting the booth, followed

closely by Makoto, and even though Usagi had eaten breakfast only an hour ago, she felt

the emptiness creeping into her stomach. The two waved good-bye to their blonde friend,

Andrew, as they passed the counter before leaving the warmth of the arcade for the cold,

bitter, winter air.

Since the temple was on the other side of town the trip lasted for nearly forty-minutes.

But to Usagi, the trip didn't last nearly long enough because by the time the young teen

reached the steps of Rei's Temple whatever little courage she'd found had bolted, leaving

her with chattering teeth and shaking knees. As Makoto began making her way up the

snow covered steps Usagi had a revelation: It was now or never and once she was inside

of those doors there would be no turning back.

Makoto stopped two steps from the top and glanced backwards looking for her friend

only to find that she was exactly where she'd left her looking lost, alone, and frozen in

the snow.

"Come on Usagi!" She yelled down. "They'll be even more upset if we're late so hurry up!"

Makoto's words broke Usagi from her trance and she ran up the wide steps taking them

two at a time. Mako was right; she was the leader of the Senshi and it was time that she

acted like one. They were friends second and teammates first, and as leader she would

not be disrespected, it was time to set some ground rules.

Usagi stepped in front of Mako and proceeded to knock on Rei's door and winced at the

loud noise it made. It was Ami, not Rei who opened the door to welcome them, well that

is, if one can call a glare a welcome.

Everyone else it seemed was already there, all of them looking mildly impatient, except

for Mamoru who showed no emotion at all. Usagi nervously checked her watch. They

were early!

Minako, without even so much as a hello, grasped Makoto's arm gently before helping

her to a chair. Rei wouldn't even look at her; she instead proffered to focus on handing

out mugs of hot ginger spice tea, while Ami was pretending to be highly engrossed in one

of her big Physics text books. To the untrained eye it would seem as though the blue-

haired Senshi of Water would be studying, but her eyes never once moved and she hadn't

turned a page in the last five minutes. Feeling her eyes well up with tears at her friends'

icy welcome, Usagi stared blankly out one of the windows at the white, fluffy

nothingness known as snow, at a complete loss for what to do or say.

Luna's eyes locked with her charge's for one long moment before she bounded onto the

table and loudly cleared her throat.

**::AHEM::** "Now that we are all present this meeting can get underway. We all are aware of the events that conspired last night, however, I at least, have yet to hear any explanations as to why things went the way they did. Usagi, once again the cat's lavender eyes found Usagi's blue ones, I am giving the floor to you now to do with what you wish. Please try to make this as short as possible, we know you have a life Usagi; we wouldn't want Senshi business to get in the way of your fun."

Usagi's legs turned to jelly as all eyes turned to her, and since all of the seats were taken,

she decided to make herself comfortable right there on the window sill.

She took a deep breath and gathered up what was left of her remaining courage before

she began speaking.

"Actually Luna, contrary to popular belief, that is not what happened. A snort could be heard from Minako on the opposite side of the room. Usagi turned to her fellow blonde before coolly replying: You wanted me to explain didn't you? It's about time you people listened to something I said, and take this seriously because I don't plan on having this conversation ever again. So shut your trap Minako and let me talk!"

Usagi Tuskino didn't know where the sudden confidence had come from, but it felt great.

"Last night was an accident; one that will never ever happen again, let me assure you."

"You're damn right it won't!" Rei burst out unfazed by the dark gaze Makoto was giving her. "We've put up with you for years and I, for one, am tired of picking up _your _slack because it's not fair!"

"Nothing we ever have to do is fair Rei! I'm sorry that it has taken me so long to accept that fact, but that's in the past. Look, last night I didn't have my communicator with me...but it was because I was with my parents. I would have had some major explaining to do if it had gone off in their presence!"

Ami opened her mouth, but did not have a chance to vocalize her question because Usagi knew what she was thinking and the answer she wanted.

"Why was I with my parents and without my communicator? Is that what you were going ask me? Well, let me tell you why. I was in the middle of getting screamed at for failing my Geometry Exam, that's why! There, I said it; I failed that stupid exam that I've been studying for the passed three weeks. But guess what, for some strange reason I really don't give a damn about that, but what I do give a damn about it the amount of respect, or lack thereof I receive on this team."

She focused on Rei, her big blue orbs filled determination. "Rei, you may be my friend, one of my best in fact, but I will not tolerate disrespect. Whether you like it or not I am leader, I am Sailor Moon, and let's just say it and get it out in the open: You guys can't do shit with out me!"

Usagi rolled her eyes when her Advisor's mouth dropped to the ground in shock.

"Pick your jaw up off the ground Luna and just listen to what I have to say. You guys know that I don't like using foul language...it's just not me. It takes a lot to piss me off and you guys have reached that point so you're gonna have to deal. C'mon guys, this is me here, Usagi, and it's time that we were real with each other. If I leave you guys are screwed, go on and admit it Luna...I'm right aren't I?"

Luna simply looked away, unable to respond. She knew that Usagi was right, even if she refused to admit to it...the earth would be doomed without her.

"Thought so... You know guys, I was talking with our good friend Mako earlier, and she made a valid point. I don't have to let you guys trod all over me in order to prove something. All these years, all I ever did was worry that you guys would kick me out or something or other, but you never did. You may have gotten angry, and you guys, especially you Rei, did make threats, but now I know that you guys would never do that. You need me like I need you, all of you. Don't you get it? People have their faults, people make mistakes, and friends are always there for each other. We have to---"

"Oh yeah, Minako broke in, then if you and Makoto over there are such good friends why did you allow her to get hurt like she did? Friends are always there for one another, but you weren't. Did you even apologize Usagi? No, I don't remember you doing anything like that, I don't remember a time in the passed couple months where you put someone else's feelings before your own. This entire meeting, once again, is all about you! And why is that? Because you are a selfish, bubble headed ditz with meatballs for brains, that's why! "

Makoto jumped up abruptly, temporarily putting an end to the other blonde's angry tirade. "That's enough! Her voice was hard with anger and her fists were balled tight, to the point that her knuckles were almost white. You will not speak to our Princess that way! I, the Senshi of Jupiter, will not allow it! Usagi puts everyone's feelings before her own every single moment, and what do we do? We rag on her constantly, and for what? So that we can let her know what a "horrible" job she's doing? I am not going sit by and let you bring down the sweetest person that I have ever met, not when we are supposed to be her friends! What is wrong with you people? You wanted her to study, you wanted her to get good grades, you wanted her to be on time to places, you wanted a leader, and that's all well and good, but there's one problem with that: You didn't want Usagi."

"Now that's where you're wrong Makoto. Mamoru began, standing as well. We want Usagi, and we still do, we just wanted her to grow up a bit! In order to measure up to her full potential she has to mature! You know that, I know that, and they know that, but I'm not sure she does!"

"You're right Mamoru, **_she_** doesn't know what you what you want! But what **_I_** do want is for you to stop talking about me like I'm not here! You are supposed to be my boyfriend, but I don't even know if you love me!"

"What the hell? Of course I love you Usako, you're my---"

"Yes, yes Mamoru, I know, I'm your Princess right? But is that all I am to you?"

The room fell silent as all the occupants waited breathlessly for Mamoru's answer.

"Usako I---"

"Answer the question Mamoru."

"........"

"I am not going to play these games with you anymore Usagi when you already know the answer! It's time you about time grew up and stopped acting like a child. How in the world do expect to rule our future kingdom if you can't walk more than three feet with falling flat on your face?"

Usagi was shaking with what seemed to be rage, but inside she was trying her hardest not to cry. "I don't know the answer to that question Mamoru, but with the way things are going between us and this team, maybe we'll never get the chance to find out. After all, Queens are supposed to be graceful, they are supposed to be wise, and they are supposed to be beautiful. Since when in any part of the universe was there ever a dumb blonde with the title of Supreme Ruler? I can't answer that one either. I am, however, sorry that I made this meeting out to be all about me, we will not be having another one like this, of that you can be sure of."

"My communicator will now be kept on my person at all times, regardless of who I may be around. That's just a risk that one has to be willing to take right? I'll keep out of your hair until the next attack, whenever that will be. Don't worry about having to hang out with me at school, it's cool, I have been neglecting Naru anyway. Hopefully our next meeting will be a lot less...violent."

Usagi grasped her bag in her still trembling hands before thrusting open the Rei's door. "See you girls later and you too...Mamoru." And with that she was gone, out the door and into the cold.

Makoto was still standing minutes after her Princess had left, simply observing her

comrades. Mamoru was gone, he had left a few minutes after Usagi. Ami was struggling

to both pack her books up and keep her tears from flooding over onto her cheeks. Rei was

busy collecting the used dishes and Minako was talking privately with Luna and Artemis.

She had never seen Usagi act the way she had before today, it wasn't the girl's nature to

be mean or to hurt people, but apparently that didn't mean that she couldn't do it.

Makoto slipped out the door unnoticed, prepared to make her way back to her apartment

so that she could call Usagi.

::LATER THAT NIGHT::

Usagi sat on her bed and stared lifelessly into her mirror. She had gone a little heavy on

the eye shadow but she didn't really care, not anymore. Besides, it wasn't like any of

those people would ever see her again, except for Connie, but that was different because

Connie understood. She ran a hand over her black leather pants, reveling in the

comforting feel of leather on her bare skin. Her top was a long sleeved black turtle neck

with intricate designs of dragons sewn all over it, and both the pants and the turtle neck

seemed to go perfectly with her sexy, knee-length, black boots.

At half passed eleven, all the lights in the Tuskino household were out, and everyone was

snuggled safely into bed, all except for one...the black sheep. She opened her window

and slipped on her shoes, readying to leap out of her pink and purple prison, but not

before casting one last backward glance at the flashing red light on her answering

machine. It was probably either Mako or Mamoru, neither of whom she wanted to talk to

right now. Usagi made one last mental check before making sure her door was securely

locked and that her phone was off the hook, just in case somebody decided that midnight

was a great time to make a call. When she was sure that everything was in place she leapt

out her window onto the ground without even so much as a hair out of place.

Tonight she was going to let go and be somebody else, anyone but stupid ol' Usagi.

Tonight, she was going to let loose and hang out with someone who actually cared about

her well being.

**::CONNIE'S BOYFRIEND'S PLACE::**

Upon her arrival, Connie had welcomed her with open arms before ushering her around

and introducing her to nearly everyone at the party, including her boyfriend, Toko. He

was well built, about Mamoru's height, with broad shoulders and muscular arms. His hair

was light brown and wavy. Toko seemed very nice, a little strange maybe, but very nice

just the same.

His house was rather large, hell, it was like a freaking mansion! People were talking,

dancing, or drinking, but everyone was having a good time.

When Connie had suggested that she dance, Usagi had been nervous, but that didn't last

for very long. She had jumped right in, shaking and swaying her body to the beat of the

music. Usagi danced with guy after guy, blocking Mamoru's image from her thoughts as

she let the music draw her in.

Around her people were laughing, and as she did a spin she what she thought to be the

glint of metal around various parts of the house, but she shrugged it off. When she grew

tired of the relentless groping and the heavy smell of smoke, Usagi made her way through

the throng of people until she found a pair of doors leading outside. Breathing deeply so

as to draw fresh oxygen into her burning lungs.

She stood there for what seemed like hours, and not even when the snow began to fall did

she make a move to go back to the party; instead she proffered to be alone. She wanted to

think, and for the first time that night since she had snuck out of her house, Usagi felt

alone and lost, like she didn't belong. Brushing away a stray tear that had begun making

its way down her cheek, she sighed deeply before turning her head upwards to look at the

nearly pitch-black night sky.

"You do know that it's like twenty-something degrees out here right?" Drawled a deep, rich voice from behind her. Usagi was roughly brought back to the real world by the sound of the voice. How long had he been standing there just watching her space out? Now he probably thought she was some sort of an idiot.

He set two plastic cups filled with an amber liquid on the table behind him before turning

to face her. He was tall, probably taller than Mamoru, with what looked to short chestnut

colored hair, but it was hard to tell, even with the flood lights on. The man flashed a

toothy grin and wiggled his eyebrows in greeting. His body was muscular and his skin

looked healthy and tan, while is big caramel colored eyes shined with mirth.

"Such a pretty girl shouldn't be standing out here all alone. She should be somewhere warm, like back inside enjoying the party."

"I'm fine really. I just needed some air." Usagi couldn't understand why she was defending herself when she didn't even know the boy who was speaking to her.

He took both of her small, red hands in his large ones and began to gently massage them.

Usagi hadn't realized just how numb her fingers had become until now.

"Don't take this the wrong way or anything, but I think you've done enough thinking for one night. I'm sorry, he said with a chuckle, where are my manners? I'm Mark Ishno, it is a pleasure to make your acquaintance Miss...?"

"Uh, it's Usagi." She stammered shyly.

"Ah, rabbit of the moon, how fitting. Well my mysterious rabbit, how about a drink to warm that body up?" Usagi, unsure of whether or not she should accept simply shrugged her shoulders. "I swear it's only coke, I'm definitely not that kind of guy." He smiled gently when the young girl gently took the cup from him and began to drink.

They sat down in two vacant lawn chairs and stared blankly up at the cold, starless sky

above them.

"So, do you happen to have a boyfriend Miss Usagi?"

"Yes---No, I mean well...."

"It's either a yes or a no. It's important to know when and if you're gonna get your nose broken by a hot girl's boyfriend before things get serious."

"No, I do not have a boyfriend of any kind Mark. But we've only known each other for five minutes!" She burst out, straining to hold back a giggle.

"Depending upon how you look at it, five minutes is like a lifetime...so I'd say we're pretty serious." Mark turned his head from Usagi to the house as groans could be heard coming from inside. "Looks like someone's playing a slow song...care to cut a rug?"

Usagi blushed deeply before nodding in agreement and standing. He stood as well and

slipped his arms around her waist, but not before gently wrapping her arms around his

neck. Both closed their eyes and moved with the music, completely cut off from the

outside world.

They kept dancing long after the song had ended, perfectly content with being in each

other's arms. Mark, spun Usagi one last time, making her giggle as she waited for the

world in front of her to stop spinning...but it never did.

Usagi let out a half giggle, half scream when Mark's face went from kind and sweet to

distorted and menacing. Her world began spinning faster and faster...to the point where it

was making her sick to her stomach. She mumbled something incoherently as her legs

gave out from under her.

"So sleepy Mamo---" Was all Usagi could say before she slipped into the icy blackness.

"Don't worry my little rabbit, I'll take care of you. You just rest awhile and everything will be just fine." He whispered the words as he stroked her forehead. That's a good girl, no one's going to hurt you anymore...not anymore..."

END PART 2

_**Author's notes: That was sort of like a small Cliff hanger right? Oh well...** I know that it has been forever since I've last updated, but please forgive me. I just didn't have any inspiration...sigh... Anyways, this is a little shorter than Part 1, but like Part I, **whether or not I will continue with Part 2 is up to YOU GUYS!!!** **If** enough **people want me to** then **I will continue**, and **if not then I won't**. So please **REVIEW and let me know what you think and whether or not you want there to be a Part 3 of "Perfect"!!!!!!!!! **_


	3. Apologies I wanna Cry

_**DEAR READERS:**_

**FIRST I AM SO INCREDIBLEY SORRY THAT THIS IS NOT AN UPDATE. BELIEVE ME, I PLANNED ON HAVING THIS DAMN CHAPTER OUT TONIGHT, BUT THAT IS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN. I'LL JUST GET TO THE POINT, IT'S GONE, ALL OF IT. THIS ENTIRE CHAPTER, THE FIRST CHAPTER OF PERFECT, AND I STILL CAN'T FIND THE SECOND CHAPTER. I MAY BE MISSING SOME OF MY OTHER CHAPTER FILES, NOT TO MENTION CLASS NOTES AS WELL. I SERIOUSLY FEEL LIKE CRYING RIGHT NOW! I HAD THEM SAVED IN FOLDERS, AND TWO DAYS AGO, I HAD TO HAVE MY COMPUTER SLURRPED (PROGRAM DELETION PROCESS). THOUGH SHE WAS ABLE TO SAVE MY OTHER DOCUMENTS TO THE HARD DRIVE (BECAUSE THE DAMN NETWORK WOULDN'T LET ME IN) SOME OF MY FILES THAT HAPPENED TO BE IN MY FOLDERS WAS LOST AS WELL. THANK GOD MY MIDTERMS ARE OVER, BECAUSE I WOULD HAVE BEEN SO SCREWED…(SIGH)**

**IN SIMPLE TERMS, MOST OF _"PERFECT"_ IS GONE. NOW I CAN FIX THE MISSING PART ONE AND TWO, BUT I WILL HAVE TO REWRITE ALL OF PART THREE, WHICH WAS NEARING TWENTY PAGES. IT WAS GOING TO BE GREAT, BUT NOW I'M STRUGGLING TO REMEMBER EVERYTHING THAT WAS INCLUDED. I NEVER KNEW WHAT THE IMPORTANCE WAS OF SAVING TO THE HARD DRIVE, OR EVEN HOW TO DO IT, SO THAT IS PARTIALLY MY FAULT, BUT I NEVER KNOW WHEN MY COMPUTER WILL START ACTING UP AND GIVING ME HELL. **

**I'M DOING THE BEST I CAN RIGHT NOW, AND WHEN THE NEW AND IMPROVED PART THREE OF _"PERFECT"_ COMES OUT, IT WILL BE GREAT. TO ALL OF MY READERS OUT THERE, I AM SO SORRY. SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY!**

**I'LL FIX THIS, BUT JUST BE PATIENT WITH ME. PLEASE! I'M WRITING EVEN AS YOU READ THIS. FORGIVE ME FOR THIS DAMNED INCONVIENIENCE. I'D LOVE TO SAY "APRIL FOOLS" OR SOME OTHER STUPID PHRASE, BUT I CAN'T…(IT'S NOT EVEN APRIL!). OH WELL, WHAT A WAY TO START THE NEW YEAR HUH? IF IT IS OF ANY CONSOLATION TO ANY OF YOU _"PARADISE OF THE MOON"_ FANS, I AM NEARLY FINISHED WITH THE NEXT INSTALLMENT, SO IT SHOULD BE OUT SOON.**

**I LOVE YOU GUYS AND AFTER WRITING THIS, I FEEL LIKE CRYING EVEN MORE…(IT'S EITHER THAT, OR I THROW MY COMPUTER OUT OF THE NEAREST WINDOW).**

_**FORGIVE ME,**_

_**GALAXYSTAR**_


	4. A Plea From A Friend

**Readers:**

**As of right now, all of my works and projects will be put on a temporary writing hiatus. Maybe I'll look at this tomorrow and be like "You moron, why did you do this, you need to write?" and maybe not. I just…I can't write during this time…my friend…one of my best friends is in the hospital, and has been for nearly three days. She took a full bottle of pills and tried to commit suicide because she felt that her life wasn't worth it, and I'm just broken. I don't feel like I can function, but if she can then I can and the doctors say that she will be fine. I feel like shit because I couldn't help her…I love her so much and I couldn't do a damn thing to stop her…she wouldn't let me. It all happened so fast…less than three weeks not to mention I went to her birthday party at the Embassy Suite Hotel only days ago…I could see she wasn't happy but then again she had just broken up with her boyfriend of three years…and it took her over the edge. My father told me…I wasn't even supposed to know, and I can't even see her. I just want to write something for her. I want to hug her and not let go for the rest of my life. I want to hug her and tell her I love her because I do! And I love her family and I can't even imagine what they're going through…I love them all. Even though I don't know you readers and fellow authors out there I do want to tell you something. Whenever you feel like no one cares about you know this: I Love You. I don't care what you look like, what music you listen to, your race, your religion, what kind of cereal you eat for breakfast… I love you and please don't ever stay silent while something's ripping at you inside, it hurts everyone and while it's so easy to say it (the effects of suicide) everyday or explain what a suicide attempt does to family and friends…you know nothing until you feel the hurt…until you experience it. Please, I beg of you…don't take your life away from this world. I've been in that black hole, a hole that's so dark and deep that you feel like you can't climb your way out of it…and so many times I've come close to letting it swallow me…but each time I pull myself out…I find an outlet and that's what I want you to do. Please don't think me silly…even an attempt, no matter how small, hurts everyone…and I'm hurting right now…I'm so sorry to all of you who were expecting long overdue updates from me…I'm sorry. **

**Love Always,**

**Galaxystar**


	5. Perfect Part 3

**PERFECT: PART III**

_**Author's Note: Finally, after months, I'm back! Thanks everyone for all of your kind words and support…I'm not gonna bore you with the details…(I'm gonna save that for my next chapter! Hahaha!)**_

_**Disclaimer: I never did and never will own Sailor Moon…happy now?**_

_**Rated R: For whatever usually happens in material reserved for this rating!**_

_**Now On to the Story:**_

Mark could feel something inside him shift and he relished it. The feeling of completion overtook him and he began to change. His eyes became long and slanted, and as black as the night sky; his fingers grew long, almost twig-like; where there had once been a human mouth there was now only a slit, held together by thin strips of pale gray skin. It was almost as if the…opening…was specially crafted for sucking the life out of its intended victim.

"Master will be pleased," rasped the creature's harsh voice, "ever so pleased."

It began to sing a lifeless tune; a melody that drained the happiness from anything and anyone. The creature felt no wind, no snow, not even the chill of the winter air that swirled about it as he stared down at his prize, and after several silent moments, It began to take on an eerie glow.

It lowered his face to Usagi's, and It's purple, snake-like darted out from between the flaps of skin to skim over her dry, cracked lips, causing her to open her mouth. Her taste was sweet, pure…and vile, and now she was his…after Master was done with her. Such a pretty human, with an even more delightful soul…It gagged at the thought, It hated words pretty and delightful, and he took comfort in the knowledge that if Master willed it, It would be allowed to twist her spirit; torture it into submission…for Its Master.

Its black glow continued to expand, until it encompassed both the creature and the girl…and the process had begun…

Then It heard the scream…

0000000

The party wasn't going to end anytime soon, and even though it had been raging for hours, it seemed as if it were just getting started. Connie sighed quietly as Toko's body pressed her own even deeper into the couch. Leave it to him to want to get touchy-feely in the middle of his overcrowded living room.

Though she couldn't see, Toko's shoulders were in the way, she could tell that they weren't the only couple getting it on in a 'very' public place. People were taking advantage of the floor, and the walls…and the tables.

She would feel better if she could at least scan the faces to make sure that none of those 'people' included Usagi, but that would involve rejecting Toko, and she wanted him so bad…

'Still,' Connie thought to herself, 'I made a promise to watch out for her, and it'll only take me second or two to keep it.' So, as much as she hated it, she withdrew her boyfriend's roaming hands from under her shirt and scooted out from underneath him. Toko groaned before trying to drag her back to him, but she merely winked and wagged her index finger, as if reprimanding an overly eager puppy.

Connie leaned down until their noses brushed and whispered that she'd be back in a moment, and then, to Toko's amazement, she was gone.

She expertly maneuvered herself between the rowdy party-goers without issue until some drunken jack-ass got it in his head to slap her ass. Connie turned, fangs bared, to confront the offending drunk, only to find that he had disappeared into the crowd. 'Lucky for him…'

0000Fifteen Minutes Later0000

Could Usagi have just slipped out…? Connie couldn't find her anywhere, and she'd made sure to check all of the obvious places, even all of the not so obvious spots. She had barely been able to breathe when she had made her way up to the long flight of steps to the final floor of Toko's house.

Connie looked into each bedroom and remained undeterred when she encountered more than a few couples who had taken up residency in order to do "The Nasty". It wasn't their bedroom, she had reminded them calmly, and she didn't give a damn about some horny guy and his whore. She was looking for someone who mattered, someone whom she had promised to take care of.

The bathrooms were searched thoroughly, and she was relieved that she didn't find little Usagi, clutching at a toilet bowel spilling her guts.

She kept going, kept searching…and turned up with nothing. There was only one more place to check, and as Connie made her way down the stairs, an uneasy feeling of dread grew in her stomach.

This time when she began to make her way through the throng of rowdy and drunk partygoers, she was shoved and jostled every which way. Connie winced when she heard the distinct sound of breaking glass and smelled the stench of pot and alcohol. What had she been thinking bringing Usagi here? Had she been out of her mind?

Absolutely!

As she made her way to the patio doors, she felt the tiny hairs on the back of her neck stand up, and for some very odd reason, her hands had begun to shake. Instinct told her that something was going on, something that was very wrong, even though she could see nothing out of the ordinary.

Connie looked around, her fingers itching to find something to hold, to protect. To protect both herself and Usagi, but from what exactly?

She picked up a baseball bat that had been lying, untouched, in a dark corner. Gripping the bat with her hand she reached forward to unlatch the too French doors.

Taking a deep breath, she stepped out onto the patio before walking out even farther, trying to find a sign that meant Usagi had been there.

There was none.

Usagi! She called in a quivering voice. Usagi!

No answer came. Then, the wind began to blow with a sudden, unexpected force. Though the breeze itself felt good, something wasn't quite right about it, and it only made Connie grip the bat even tighter.

Looking up at the moon shine through trees, it was then that an eerie fact dawned upon her.

Even though the wind was blowing, the tree branches weren't moving.

She rubbed at her eyes in disbelief, and sure enough, even though she could feel the wind…nothing else was being touched by it.

Shivering, she turned around to go back and find the few remaining sober partiers to see what was going on…

And then she saw…It.

0000000000

The bat slipped from her fingers as her face became a picture of horror and revulsion.

Nearly twenty feet away from her was…oh God!

She couldn't move, couldn't breathe and the stench of the creature' rancid breath assaulted her nostrils. Connie couldn't describe the creature, but Its hideous face and body would be forever seared into the deepest, darkest part of her memory.

That was when the screams began, but she couldn't be sure just who was doing the screaming.

Connie tried to focus on Usagi; had to find a way to catch her bearings. Breaking down like a little girl in front of a freak in a costume wouldn't help Usagi.

Her throat was so dry…she couldn't swallow, could barely move her lips to form words, while her tongue was glued to the roof of her mouth.

"You," the creature rasped, "will not have what belongs to my master. Leave us in peace mortal bitch."

"I don't care if you're crazy." Connie could hear herself speaking, but couldn't feel her lips moving. "I don't care if you're wearing a costume and hit the booze too hard. I don't give a shit about anything involving you, but you see this bat here?"

Bending down, her fingers closed over the handle of the bat, and then she struck a batting pose.

'If you don't put her down and get a mother-fucking tic-tac, I'm gonna hit you so hard it'll knock the craziness right out of you! You've got to the count of three, bozo, and then I'll have you begging for mercy!"

The creature clutched the small blonde even closer to Its filthy, mutilated body. "It is you who should be on your knees, groveling, begging for my master's mercy. "

"One!"

Connie took two steps forward.

"The princess is lost to you. Accept what is and prepare for the end of all you hold dear, mortal bitch."

"You've got one more time to call me that you shit-bag! Two!"

"His mercy will not be given to the likes of you. You mean nothing; you are worth nothing!" It kept chanting, speaking of the wonders of Its master through closed eyes, so involved in Its own little world…so much in fact that It didn't hear the final, most important word…

As Its long, witch-like fingers skimmed the material covering Usagi's left breast, IT took one last pleasure filled breath…

"Three…!"

A loud crack could be heard as Connie swung the baseball bat with all her strength, making sure it came into contact with the side of Its face. And it was then that Connie realized all those years of Little League had finally paid off.

The creature that was once Mark was howling in pain, and blood, black and ugly oozed what was most likely meant to be an eye. It let go of Usagi, hissed, and dropped down onto all fours, ready to attack.

Never had a mortal, a human, caused him so much pain…no creature, other than his Master had ever made him bleed…and somewhere deep within, It was frightened.

Connie swung again, and the still dazed demon moved swiftly to the side, but the thick part of the bat still found away to connect with the injured part of Its head, and It shrieked. It shrieked, and continued shrieking hideously until Connie was forced to drop to her knees and cover her ears to keep her brain from bursting inside of her skull.

'Where was everyone? Couldn't they hear what was going on just a few feet away from the house? Why hadn't someone come to check on the noise…why?'

'Omigod…Omigod…Omigod!' Connie cried softly, as she crawled towards the unconscious Usagi. When she reached her, Connie wrapped her arms around her slim form and held tight, squeezing her eyes shut and doing her best to keep from screaming herself…

And then…

The world stopped. And so did Connie's heart.

And then, as if by the will of some miraculous being, the world began to move again, and both Connie and Usagi were sprawled in the grass, both dazed and breathing heavily and scared out of their minds...and that was when Connie looked up to find---

_That they were alone, and all was quiet._

0000000

Mamoru's slipper covered feet padded softly towards the doorway of his apartment, and after fussing with a series of locks, he opened the door to find none-other than Makoto waiting impatiently in the hallway.

"Can I…help you?" He inquired softly.

"I'd like to come in Mamoru. You're not busy are you?"

"Actually I just…" He trailed off after he took a look at the Senshi of Jupiter's determined face. "No, I suppose I've got a minute."

Makoto closed the door behind her and then carefully slipped of her shoes before seating herself on a couch in his apartment. Mamoru followed hesitantly behind her.

"Can I help you?" He repeated lamely.

She watched him seat himself in an arm chair before replying.

"Have you heard from Usagi lately?"

"Is that what this is about Makoto?" He laughed dryly. "This is Usagi, she's probably off pouting in a corner somewhere; if she were in danger I would know."

"Mamoru, you mean to tell me that you haven't heard from all day and you're not worried? I mean, the way she left after the meeting today…the way you left the meeting today, I would have thought that she would have at least called you…"

"Well she hasn't, but she'll be fine. She's a big girl Mako, and like I said, if she's gotten herself into trouble somehow then I would have felt it by now."

"Mamoru, I know that you can feel when she's in trouble, but isn't that only when she's being attacked by a monster from the Negaverse or the Dark Kingdom?"

"Isn't that all she's usually attacked by? I mean, come on, if your referring to the kind of trouble that involves her tripping over her own two feet then there's nothing I can do, short of getting her walking lessons."

Makoto felt herself tense up at Mamoru's insult, but she let it slide.

"I'm being serious Mamoru."

He leaned back in his chair and folded his arms over his chest.

"So am I."

She sighed and decided to try a different approach.

"I think she's been hurting herself."

Mako winced at the bluntness of her own statement as it repeated itself in her head.

"Excuse me?"

"I don't know, I guess I could just be paranoid or whatever, but I saw these marks on her arm, at least I thought I saw them and---"

"Have you actually seen the marks?"

"Well I think so but---"

"Then maybe you're just making a mountain out of a molehill. Ever think of that?"

She resisted the painful urge to rise from the couch and smack Mamoru, but she remained seated and was determined to stay that way.

"Look Mamoru, I'm not an idiot. I know I saw something that doesn't fit, I know I did. Aren't you even worried? Don't you even care about your own girlfriend?"

"Of course I do Makoto, but she and I will talk when she's mature enough to come and talk this out with me, and explain why she acted like a kid the way she did at the meeting. Until then, things are staying the way they are."

Makoto growled darkly at his obvious unconcern before replying.

"You know what Mamoru, this conversation has been an absolute waste of time."

"Yeah, you're right Makoto, it was an absolute waste of _my _time."

"She's hurting and you're not helping! Nobody is fucking helping her, they're not even trying!"

Makoto had risen from the couch and her cheeks were red with absolute fury.

"Damn it! She doesn't need our help, she needs to grow up, and she needs to do it now. I want the best for her, because I love her! I love her, but she's an endangerment to the Senshi, herself, and those around her." Mamoru rose as well and took a threatening step towards Makoto. "It's people like you that are holding her back from she should be, it's you who won't let her grow up! I want her to fight, I want her to be a warrior; it's about time she stepped up to what is expected of her…and how the fuck is she supposed to rule a planet if she doesn't start acting the part now?"

"She fights for what's right every-fucking day Mamoru! And does she even get a thank you? How about a good job, or even a pat on the back, or anything?"

He narrowed his eyes and gave a terse reply.

"Knowing the fact the she's kept the world safe from the forces of evil and that humans are still free to live and breathe should be thanks enough. If she wants someone to pop up and congratulate her after fumbling through a battle day after day…well then, she's more selfish than I ever thought possible."

"I meant from us you asshole! She tries her fucking hardest every goddamn battle and never once do we say good job Usagi, or way-to-go Usagi, do we? We put her down! She's the sweetest, beautiful, and most kindhearted person that I know. She didn't ask for this, she didn't want to be a Sailor Senshi, and she didn't ask to be some ancient princess, but she's stepped up to the plate and she's been there for us both on and off the battlefield!"

"None of us asked for this Makoto, but we've all accepted it. That excuse is old; maybe she should find a new one. That shouldn't be too hard; I'm sure she's got a book of them somewhere."

"You're such a cold person, Mamoru. I had thought that being with a girl like Usagi would have softened you at least a little bit." She laughed bitterly before continuing. "I don't what she sees in you Mamoru…I really don't."

He sighed and ran a tired hand over his face. "On that note," he began stiffly, "why don't you leave Makoto? I'm expecting someone any minute now and frankly…you've been nothing but a pain in the ass today."

"Well isn't that a coincidence?" She grumbled under her breath. Her body was as stiff as voice, but she managed to bend and grab her purse before making her way to the door. She put her shoes back on walked out into the hallway

Makoto had made it out of the apartment complex and was briskly walking down the street when she had another idea. She'd talk to Ami, surely she would be able to help, and she'd understand. All she needed now was to contact her via Senshi Communicator and part of her problem would be solved.

She dug through her purse, searching for her communicator, only to come up empty handed. Makoto growled loudly, causing the old business man that had been walking behind her to nervously pick up his pace and pass the angry brunette. She never left home without it…so then it had to have fallen out of her purse when she had gone to see Mamoru.

Makoto spun on her heel and retraced her steps back to Mamoru-Baka's apartment, walked back through the lobby, hopped into the elevator and then rode to level thirteen. She made her way down the hall until she reached the door to Mamoru's apartment. The door was slightly ajar, and though most would deem it rude to enter another's apartment without permission, Mako was sure that she had dropped somewhere near the entrance.

She quietly pushed the door open and looked around. There was no sign of Mamoru, and no still no sign of her communicator. 'Damn!'

Mako walked though the kitchen and then silently padded out into the living room… And then in a matter of seconds, Makoto forgot all about her communicator because there was

Mamoru, standing in the middle of the room with his back turned to her…

And with another woman wrapped in his arms…

Makoto stood transfixed by Mamoru and the woman, and she could feel the inside of her stomach begin to twist violently as a hot, bitter liquid rushed up to her throat, nearly choking her…

So she took a step back…and then another, until she was nearly out of the living room. As she turned to leave, she and the other woman locked eyes…

_And **Rei** had never looked more shocked in her entire life…_

0000000

Usagi awoke to heavy limbs, a pounding headache and blurred vision, only to find herself tucked away in someone else's bed. Though her thoughts were still fuzzy, she could still make out her surroundings enough to panic.

The lights had been dimmed, and the room smelled faintly of scented candles, and from the sound of it, the party was still raging downstairs. She didn't know how she had gotten in this bed, or who had put her there. The last thing she remembered was…falling…into a deep, dark hole…and she had been staring up into Mark's face the entire time…

"Oh God!" She squeaked weakly. "Oh God!"

Forgetting about the heaviness of her limbs, she checked her body for bruises. Had he been holding her so tightly that he had left impressions of his fingers on her arms; because those marks definitely had not been there before…?

And it was then that the realization hit her…could he have…**_raped her_?**

Usagi shuddered and then slowly rose on watery legs. Were you supposed to feel pain…'down there' if you were raped? Looking at the door to make sure that no one would come in, she apprehensively lowered her leather pants to her knees. She bit her lip and then proceeded to check her underwear for any sign that something was different…and she had often heard that bleeding could occur after a 'first time', but thankfully, there was none.

She replaced her clothing lowered herself back onto the strange bed, in the strange room, in the strange house. Covering her face with her hands, she let out a muffled sob. And for one fleeting second, she wished she had something to take care of her fear, to relieve the pain, both emotional and physical, from her being.

Usagi removed her hands from her face and looked at her arm that still bore the scars from her last breakdown. She traced every scar with one, delicate fingertip, became disgusted with herself when she realized that she wished she had a razor, a pocket knife…even a paper clip would be alright! Anything to temporarily get rid of the pain…

She wiped at the tears that were running down her cheeks and wished that someone…anyone would tell her what happened. Usagi didn't think that she had been raped, but deep down inside…she knew that she had somehow been violated…

Just as Usagi was ready sink under the covers and curl into a ball, the door burst open and in tumbled a horny couple that had had one too many drinks.

The small, voluptuous redhead was tearing at the clothes of her tall, muscled counterpart. They were moaning and groping each other in a hurried frenzy as they struggled to rid themselves of all clothing.

The man grabbed the girl by her ass and lifted her up so she could wrap her thighs around his waist, and so he could remove her bra with a bit more ease.

It was only when the guy's shirt landed on Usagi's head that she made a noise, which stopped the two from carrying on any further. Both were too drunk to be embarrassed at being caught.

The man leered at Usagi as he looked over her huddled form. "Were you enjoying the show sweetheart?"

Usagi said nothing, but silently watched as the redhead's slipped down to cup 'his package' in her hand and began to massage through his pants.

"You wanna play baby?" The woman slurred drunkenly, and she reeked of alcohol.

Usagi simply shook her head in a response.

"Too bad, the man replied, we could have had some fun." He reached for the woman's hand that was still massaging him, undid the zipper of his pants, and slid her hand inside.

The woman moaned softly, and used her lips to tug on her boyfriend's earlobe. "C'mon Steven…she's just a little kid who doesn't wanna play." Then the redhead seemed to reconsider for a second. "Aww Stevie, she began in her best whiny little girl voice, I wanna play; make her play!"

"Mmmm…okay Vicky. Just hold on a sec…"

The two became enraptured with each other again, but this time, Steven maneuvered the two of them out the door and into the hall before slamming the door shut behind them.

Usagi shivered at what she had just seen before crawling back into the covers and throwing them over her head.

:TEN MINUTES LATER:

Usagi heard a knock and then the creak of a door, and then the covers were gently pulled away from her body…

"It's good to see you awake, Usagi…"

The blonde sighed in relief. It was only Connie.

"Connie! Oh boy, am I glad to see you! I'm so confused and when I woke up I didn't know where I was or how I got here and---Are you okay? Oh God, Connie your arm!"

A pale faced Connie didn't even look down at her poorly bandaged wrist, she already knew that the blood had soaked through the cloth, and she didn't care.

"What did you? Why did you---? Connie, we've got to get you to a hospital or something…"

Connie simply shook her head, before wrapping her arms around Usagi and burying her face in Usagi's shoulder…

Usagi's arm immediately reached up to comfort the sobbing Connie, and she carefully began to rub her back.

"I thought you were dead!" She sobbed. "I thought he…it…whatever the hell it was had killed you! You were barely even breathing…and you wouldn't wake up, oh Jesus, you wouldn't wake up! Nobody heard anything, but it was so weird…I don't even understand…"

Usagi bit her chewed on her lip as she thought of something to say. Everything from the time she had been talking with Mark to the time she had awakened in bed was still a jumbled mess of thoughts. "Umm…Connie…I don't really know…"

"Nobody heard a single fucking thing, Usagi! It was so…it was hideous and it kept touching you and and…" Connie squeezed Usagi as her breath came in shuddering gasps. "All it did was scream and it was so loud that I thought my head was gonna explode, and he wouldn't let you go… Oh god…I thought he'd never let you go!"

"Connie…"

"I hit the…demon-thing with a bat and then it ran away. I had to drag you in the house and some guy helped me carry you upstairs…" Sob "And your lips were blue…and you were so cold…"

"I'm so sorry Connie…I'm so sorry. What---what happened to your arm?"

Connie pulled back enough to flash Usagi a watery smile. "I made the pain go away. I wanted to be numb, I didn't want to feel anything…so had to find a way to get rid of all the bad stuff, and I did. I brought along my little 'Life-Savor'. I always keep an extra in my purse in case I need it…"

"You have to let me look at it, okay? I just want to make sure that you don't need stitches or anything."

Once again Connie shook her head.

"He called you a Princess, Usagi. Do you know what he was talking about?"

"No…I'm sorry, but I have no idea…" She answered hesitantly.

"Are you sure? Are you in some sort of trouble?"

"Connie, I already told you that I don't know. I can't even remember anything that happened. I woke up in here and had no idea about where I was. I feel like I can barely even remember my own name! I'm sorry that you put you're life in danger for me, but thank you, for what ever you did. I guess I wouldn't still be here without you…"

Connie nodded and sniffled softly.

"Usagi," she began quietly, "I think that there's something that I need to tell you…"

"What is it?"

"I think I…I think I…that I---"

And then…Connie's warm lips were somehow pressed against Usagi's cold ones.

After a few seconds…Usagi pushed Connie away…

"Connie…I think it's time that I left…"

**END **

**Author's Notes: IN NO WAY IS THIS A LESBIAN FIC GUYS…THIS WAS PURELY TO ADD TO THE SEEMINGLY COMPLICATED PLOT! IF YOU'RE CONFUSED NOW, IMAGINE WHAT IT MUST BE LIKE TO FIGURE OUT WHAT YOU'RE WRITING…I THINK I CONFUSED MYSELF HAHAHAHA! Thanks for reading AND I will do my best to update as soon as possible! I hoped you liked this chapter, and please leave a review! I'll love you forever!**


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